Prepare for Auditions:
1 comedic monologue, classic or contemporary, and 1 song (acapella, with own instrument of Bluetooth speaker)
Summary: A meeting is held in hell between all the deceased villains from history and literature. The subject: how to do away with Christmas? After several suggestions and some bickering, they land on the idea of killing Santa. Straws are drawn and the Roman emperor, Nero, is chosen to go to the North Pole. At this point in the story, he will exit the elevator from hell to a different location that will point him in the direction of the North Pole and feature a song or a poem about Christmas in that region. He eventually gets to Santa, who greets Nero warmly. Nero finds himself unable to go through with the plot as Santa gives him what he’s always wanted: a new Stradivarius. This is a rhyming piece, similar to Dr. Suess.
Narrator, Male, 30’s-50’s – Classic velvet smoking jacket w/slippers Dad type. Smarmy and slightly condescending but also likable and a riveting story-teller. Comedic timing will be key as the narrator reacts to interruptions, sometimes from the characters themselves. Some light singing.
Nero, Male, 20’s-50’s – The Roman Emperor who, according to legend, was a harsh ruler and fiddled while Rome burned. He is a classical music lover and conducts himself with an air of superiority, disdainful of the other fiends in hell. Very uptight and “type A”. At his center, he has a good heart and is somewhat loveable, but seldom lets it show.
Mephisto, Female, 30’s + Called “Master Chairwoman” by the demons, she is the devil herself. Makes a grand entrance but then gets to serious business. She is tough and political, without needing to rely on being pretty. Sharp and scary. Though she runs hell democratically, she runs it. Must be able to sing.
Haman, Male, 20+- A biblical villain from the book of Esther, Haman is always playing the political game by trying to kiss up to Mephisto, which earns him both friends and enemies in hell. The most outspoken of the fiends, Ivan often interjects during other people’s proposals without making one himself. He is caught arguing with Ivan the Terrible. This actor will also make a later appearance as a stop on Nero’s way to the North Pole, delivering a poem or song, to be chosen with the director. Must be able to sing.
Lucrezia Borgia, Female 20+ - A kind of “black widow” figure, Lucrezia was thought to have poisoned several people while she ran the political scene of Italy. She is regarded as the prettiest among the fiends as while as commanding their respect as a deadly assassin. It is her idea the fiends agree on, which is to eliminate Santa Claus. This actor will also make a later appearance as a stop on Nero’s way to the North Pole, delivering a poem or song, to be chosen with the director. Must be able to sing.
Ivan the Terrible, Male 20’s + - Russian accent. A man of luxury, he suggests poisoning Christmas treats. He has a rivalry with Haman and is very outspoken about it. This actor will also make a later appearance as a stop on Nero’s way to the North Pole, delivering a poem or song, to be chosen with the director. Must be able to sing.
Simon Legree/ Santa Claus, White, Male 30+ - The cruel slave owner from Uncle Tom’s Cabin. He is not much liked by the other demons, but doesn’t seem to notice. Speaks with a slow Southern drawl and is very gentlemanly, proposing to bribe members of Congress. This actor will also play Santa Claus, easily diffusing Nero’s murderous resolve with kindness and a welcoming demeanor. Classic Santa. Some singing
Tech Booth Operators: Run the light and Soundboard during our performances.